#chat

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a few seconds ago

chat abt nostalgia i am an extemely nostalgic person but in a sad way. i think about how happy and unaware of things i was as a child and i still try my best to be that person but its often hard, especially during winter months. i am afraid of losing memory of my teenage years as theyre meant to be the "glory days" and i dont remember much before i was 11 to begin with bc im so scared of losing this memory, im also very scared of change. especially change that i cant control. recently, an old college campsite has begun decontruction and the thought of it makes my chest feel tight, takes the wind out of my body. i didnt even attend this college which is what is causing problems for me. ive step foot in that college once within my life time to watch my sister in a school performance as theyd hired out the hall. so why am i so affected?? i cant imagine what its going to be like when the campus of my own college gets knocked down. i dont know why i identify so heavily with this building that i havent even spent more than 5 hours inside of. i feel like it may be because its closure is pretty unique to my generation. all the edgy kids in school would talk about how they have/want to hang out there and we would tell stories about how it was haunted and im sad that thats gonna stop but maybe im just thinking too far into it. theyre also moving the library which brings tears to my eyes because that is deep in my heart. i went to an art group there from the ages of 12-16 and its the reason ive met most of my friends. i dont know what theyre doing to the building but its either gonna be abandoned, changed into something else, or knocked down. i dread all 3 of those options. i spent a lot of time in that place as a child too. getting 5-6 books out at a time and reading them all way before the due date. but i really feel upset about this and no one understands #mentalhealth #chat #babble #gay #gayboy #gayteen #transgender #trans #transman

a few minutes ago

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a few minutes ago

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