25 minutes ago
I just want to say thank you to everybody who prayed for me or sent me a kind message. Panic attacks are no joke. At about 6:45 last night, I felt like I was going to have a heart attack. I was on stage at Church, prepping to sing for the service and it hit me like a ton of knife wielding bricks. Its the most suffocating yet aggressively horrible feeling you could ever possibly feel. I did my best battle through the service¬ publically let it seem like I was struggling to the best of my ability. But all I wanted to do was cry, run and just stop hurting. I couldnt catch my breath. My throat felt like a snake was literally suffocating me. My heart hurt as if somebody was twisting it and squeezing it in their hands&don't even get me started on the thoughts that were running through my head. This pain/discomfort stayed with me until I fell asleep at about 2 a.m. &thankfully I woke up this morning feeling a lot better. I have definitely felt better. But compared to last night, I feel infinitely better
I'm not perfect&I don't have it all together. Sometimes we go through some real stuff&it's easy to look at somebody and see a smile on their face and think that everything in their life is perfect&dandy... When in fact, that's not REALITY at all. I was on stage last night praising God to the best of my ability, battling some very deep waves of pure HELL that were trying to dismantle me. Did anybody notice? Im not sure. But,does anybody notice what's REALLY going on right before our eyes most of the time,Honestly?
Moral of the story, GO OUT OF YOUR WAY to be kind. If it takes someone to go through hard times, publicly for you to actually care or realize that something is wrong...& its already too late. You can ask somebody how they're doing all day&they will probably reply that they are doing just fine. Nobody wants to be a burden. I definitely don't. But who out there takes the time to REALLY dig deep&find out what's going on in somebody's life? Instead of joking around&trying to get a rise out of people at the cost of others, I challenge you to actually UPLIFT those around you&to be a LIGHT in their life, despite what you "THINK" you know about their life #NMW